Trigger Warning: Offensive language below.
Today I had my first run in with someone on a site I work on that felt the need to belittle me and my life like he knew exactly where I was going to end up at. While I don’t take a damn word he said to heart, I take the notion that people like this exist. I can’t walk around pretending to be ignorant with my fingers in my ears and my eyes clamped shut. This is one of the major reasons I started this blog.
The conversation I had today, on my journal I posted back in January of me coming out to my clients and watchers.
Stranger: Huh so wait, your family is actually staying together?
Stranger: Damn, that’s crazy. Is your husband bi?
Me: Yes he is and what’s crazy about it? Even if he wasn’t it’s not like I’m magically going to make a penis poof and appear. There are relationships that do last after such things as these. Mine is not the first nor the last. In fact I know of quite a few on FB that are doing wonderfully years after someone transitioned.
Stranger: I’ve just never heard of it actually working out like that, especially with kids involved.
Me: I was surprised at how many relationships actually there are that are in the exact same situation as mine and things worked wonderfully. But I’m glad to see it.
Stranger: Most I’ve seen usually involve anger, frustration, emotional distance, passive aggressiveness, lying, separation, divorce, or years of attempting to make it work only for everyone involved to slowly realize that the elephant in the room is just going to keep growing and that the last 5 years of their time together was a waste that could have been spent with people they actually care about because they can’t stand to look at each other but have to for the sake of the children who already blame the tranny for ruining their family anyway.
Me: Well all righty then. My family and children have been very accepting of this change and make great efforts to accept and allow me in. I’ve had extensive talks with my husband and therapist and just don’t see any of that happening with my life. My situation might be uncommon but it’s not unheard of.
Stranger: I’m taking over/under bets on 5 years.
Me: You’re what?
Stranger: The length of time before the shit and the fan meet one another.
Me: Yeah, I’m going to block you now. That’s rude as hell and not going to be accepted. You just don’t say that shit to someone. Have a good day away from me and my life now.
I have a pretty strict 0 policy on these types of issues. I try to express and inform first. If the bigoted person feels they want to stick to their guns, they get a block. I want to make clear that you don’t have to tolerate hurtful people. Please don’t ever feel like these people run your life. They don’t. This to me, serves as a learning and growing experience. This shows there is still loads to change in this world. Education is a big factor. Many people just don’t know and thus they assume. But obviously this was not the case here.
These are the types of people who make it hard for everyone who’s different. That’s like walking up to a gay couple and saying, “Oh you are going to hell. Have a nice day.”
It’s not correct, it’s not called for. It’s rude, close minded and bigoted and should NOT be accepted. I will fight until I hit my grave against this type of thinking. Even if I make the slightest bit of difference. It’ll at least be something.